Inner Exploration

Forgiveness

Brings healing

Your opinion matters
Your opinion matters
Web Wisdom

Forgiveness means letting go of anger or resentment toward someone who has hurt you.

It's crucial for mental wellness because it can bring healing and peace.

It's like releasing a heavy burden you've been carrying.

Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, but it helps you move forward and reduce emotional pain.

It benefits your mental health by freeing you from negativity, promoting emotional well-being, and restoring harmony in your life.

Your Toolbox

Extract from: Owning our Struggles by Minaa B. 2023

Tools:

Complete the following exercise by practicing audio journaling.

Grab your phone, press the Record button, and answer the following prompts out loud.

Listen intently to your response when your done, and replay this as an affirmation to remind yourself of your process.

*Finish the sentence: “I hold the power to …”

Finish the sentence: “I am forgiving myself for …”*

To take this exercise to the next level outside of the prompts I provided, take five to ten minutes to record yourself talking freely about an event or interaction that upset you. Get it all out.

Then listen to the recording to assess whether there are any discrepancies, the same way you would listen to a friend and give them advice to help them discern between rational and irrational thoughts.

*Do you have more clarity on the situation and yourself?

What did you learn about your way of thinking after playing the audio back?*

Author's Opinion

Extract from: Owning our Struggles by Minaa B. 2023

Forgiveness and compassion

Practicing self-forgiveness is vital to healing.

Self-forgiveness does not mean forgetting.

It is not an undoing of your past actions, nor does it mean getting a pass on your harmful behaviors.

You will still face the consequences for your actions.

Self-forgiveness means opening our eyes to our actions and seeing them clearly without the cloud of shame or denial.

We can't move forward when we are gripped by the weight of shame, and when we aren't moving forward, we are at risk for recycling old patterns that can lead to further harm.

In the words of Brene’ Brown, “Shame corrodes the very part of us that believe we are capable of changing”

Practicing self-forgiveness looks like:

*Acknowledging the mistakes you've made

*Owning the consequences that result from your choices

*Commiting to change behavior, not just for the other person, but also for others and yourself.

*Owning your own guilt and not treating it as a character flaw

*Apologizing to yourself for not knowing better

*Apologizing to yourself for knowing better and choosing not to do better

**Self-compassion is the foundation of self-forgiveness. **

We are flawed, imperfect human beings, which means that we will make mistakes in life, and unfortunately some of those mistakes will cost us deeply.

Practicing self- compassion looks like:

*Being kind to yourself when things go wrong

*Allowing yourself not to be perfect

*Showing kindness and patience

*Being accepting of your flaws and shortcomings

*Being understanding when you mess up

*Nurturing yourself through positive self-talk

*Being non-judgemental and less self-critical

You have the ability to give yourself what you've been missing

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Updated: November 2023

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